


Papa Hawkass and Baby LadyBitch: Adventures in College!!

by GraceRosana



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: 2 chaps so far, Adri is they them, Adrien is he him, Adrien(ne) Agreste, Adrienne is she her, Crack, GRo has 4 braincells, Gen, Genderfluid Character, Group chat, Tags Are Fun, Tags Are Hard, Weirdness, also Adrien(ne) Agreste, and 1 spin off thing that technically takes place, and Demiro, and is NB, and none of them were used for this, and you fill in gaps, aroace character, but not in same pov or anything, cause GRo has no self control, in the same universe, its supposed to be chronological, serious tags who?, that they lomve, with AroAce friends
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-03
Updated: 2020-10-03
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:33:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26789005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GraceRosana/pseuds/GraceRosana
Summary: Marinette wasn't sure how her life reached this point. Her ex-crush turned best friend, who also happened to be her partner in crime (not that she knew that yet), came out as genderfluid and aroace. Then they graduated. And now she's looking into Universities. There was a great one in New York that she wanted to attend, but there's just one problem ... Akumas. After thinking for some time about how to deal with this problem she came up with a risky solution .. Let Hawkmoth know the situation, and hope that he would agree to let her attend school. Somehow she managed it, she's still not quite sure how, and now her and Hawkmoth have direct contact to each other. She's not sure how her life reached this point. Might as well roll with it?? It's not gonna be like any of her other group chats shes in, Marinette was quite positive of that.Marinette Dupain-Cheng would soon learn how wrong she was. Watch her learn how to live when Hawkmoth was quite literally on her speed-dial.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth & Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Kudos: 68





	Papa Hawkass and Baby LadyBitch: Adventures in College!!

**Author's Note:**

> yeah idk, enjoy?

Marinette stared at her phone, wondering how she got to this point. When she and Hawkmoth traded numbers for completely separate phones he bought for purely Ladybug and Hawkmoth reasons she never imagined that she would get this kind of text.

Papa Hawkass: don't forget to study for your exam tomorrow, you know Mx. Kiko is going to give you a 'surprise' essay at the end.

Baby LadyBitch: yeah yeah, already studied for that one.

Right after replying she looked over at her roommate, "how do you get rid of villainous father figures who tell you to study?"

"Well I wouldn't know, I don't have a villain or a father figure," Sam replied, thinking Marinette was joking. Honestly she wished she was.

~~

If you had told Marinette two years ago that she would have a deal with Hawkmoth that involved them trading phone numbers, she probably would have started looking for an akumatized object. But alas, here she is .. in a deal with Hawkmoth .... Texting him ..... On phones that he paid for so that neither of them had to give their actual numbers.

After Marinette got accepted into a college in America that had a great fashion program, she found a way to contact Hawkmoth. Chat and herself had long found out that he did indeed listen into the banter between the two of them, as well as between them and the Akuma. So during a fight, before Chat showed up, she informed him that she wished to study abroad and if he could at least warn her before he sent out an akuma. 

Somehow he found the kindness deep down in his cold, dead, and blackened heart to allow her that. Saying that he knew how stressful college was and that even he wasn't so much a monster as to expect her to completely ruin her life just to focus on him, his words not hers. Thankfully, for now, Hawkmoth had held up his side of the deal. She would get texts informing her before he sent out a new butterfly and in return she had an adult to give her adulting advice and to whom she could safely rant her problems to. Safely meaning he was far away, so no chances of being akumatized. Also he knew she was Ladybug, so he would have more of an understanding of her problems.

Both of them had learnt way too much information about the other during this time. So even though she didn't have verbal confirmation she knew for a fact that he was Gabriel Agreste. Just as he knew that Ladybug was definitely Marinette Dupain-Cheng. Neither of them did anything with the information though, cause again no verbal confirmation from either side. 

She knew it was him when he said something about his child struggling with their teaching degree as Adri was messaging her asking for help with classes for a teaching degree. Although she didn’t know for sure, she thinks he figured it out after she sent him pics of her fashion design homework. (He learned very quickly to never get her started on Akuma designs. She totally never gave him an earful about his fashion choices for the Akumas .. totally .... Don't look at her like that.)

~~

Hawkmoth: Some kid just got frustrated with his teacher, I am sending out an Akuma.

*5 minutes later*

Hawkmoth: Hello? Ladybug? Where are you?

*2 minutes later*

Hawkmoth: Are you ignoring me, Ladybug?

Hawkmoth: Ladybug, the Akuma is close to defeating Chat Noir.

*3 minutes later*

Hawkmoth: I’m recalling the Akuma, and am going to assume that you were busy at this time.

*2 hours later*

Ladybug: I WAS ASLEEP YOU ASSHOLE

Hawkmoth: I see. I will have to remember that you are in a completely different timezone in the future.

Ladybug: YOU THINK???

Hawkmoth: My apologies.

~~

Hawkmoth: Are you busy?

Ladybug: I'm eating lunch

Hawkmoth: Ok so not busy, some guy just got upset.

Ladybug: what part of 'Im eating lunch' implied that I'm not busy????

Hawkmoth: I will get your Miraculous this time Ladybug.

Ladybug: I'm not coming till after lunch

Hawkmoth: .. you promised.

Ladybug: IM BUSY RIGHT NKW

Hawkmoth: I guess the black cat Miraculous is definitely mine this time.

Ladybug: YOU BASTARD, DAMMIT AND THEY HAD PROPER MACAROONS THIS TIME

Hawkmoth: :)

Ladybug: DONT YOU SMILEY FACE AT ME HAWKASS

~~

Hawkmoth: Hi

Ladybug: hello?

Hawkmoth: my assistant won't talk to me, so I'm here to bother you

Ladybug: I don't wanna hear it

Hawkmoth: too bad

Ladybug changes Hawkmoth to Hawkass

Hawkass: I am offended

Ladybug: :)

Hawkass changes Ladybug to LadyBitch

LadyBitch: :(

Hawkass: so anyways my assistant is avoiding me and I need to vent about annoying employees

LadyBitch: .. serves you right

~~

Hawkass: a yoyo makes no sense *why* is that your weapon????

Ladybitch: it's 2a here why are you texting me????? I have class soon. And also IDK???????? I JUST HAD IT??????? I WOULD PREFER TO HAVE SOMETHING ACTUALLY USEFUL LIKE KNITTING NEEDLES?????

Hawkass: ... It's 8h32 here, and I was thinking about it in the shower. Also you don't have class till 10 you'll be fine. And also also knitting needles are not useful in battle

Ladybitch: .. why were you thinking about my weapon in the *shower*?????? Pervert. And I hate how you know my schedule now. Stalker. And clearly you've never seen me when first waking up before I've had coffee. Knitting needles can be extremely dangerous.

Hawkass: .. I am not a pervert or a stalker! Child!! Knitting needles are about as dangerous as sewing pins! I would know!

Ladybitch: technically I am still a child, I just entered university..... And ok fine you aren't a pervert, but I'm keeping you as stalker only cause I barely know my schedule. And sewing needles are extremely dangerous????? Have you ever stabbed yourself cause you are sewing half asleep?????

Hawkass: ok yeah that's fair, you can keep the stalker. And yes I have!!!! They hurt for a little bit but not for long!

Ladybitch: hmph

Hawkass: Child

Ladybitch: and like a Child I should be asleep so nighty-night!!

Hawkass: ... It's 8h42

Ladybitch: not here it's not

Hawkass: ugh fine I'll just bother my secretary

Ladybitch: that poor lady needs a raise

~PM between Adrien(ne) Agreste and Marinette Dupain-Cheng~

***AFashionistaNeedsCoffee changes their name to PinsAndNeedlesAreViableWeaponsHawkie***

Catscatscatscatscats: do I wanna know?

PinsAndNeedlesAreViableWeaponsHawkie: nope

Catscatscatscatscats: kay

~~

Ladybitch: should I be doing homework? Yes

Ladybitch: am I going to be doing homework? No

Ladybitch: ah shit, wrong chat sorry

Hawkass: do your homework, you will regret not doing it later

Ladybitch: I dont wanna, you cant make me. youre not my dad :/

Hawkass: .. if that’s what it takes to make you do your work then fine

***Hawkass changes Hawkass to Papa Hawkass***

Ladybitch: .. :(((( nu

***Papa Hawkass changes Ladybitch to Baby LadyBitch***

Baby LadyBitch: .. did you have to capitalize the Bitch??

Papa Hawkass: Yes.

Baby LadyBitch: Ugh. Fine I’ll do my homework

Papa Hawkass: :)

Baby LadyBitch: :(

~~

Baby LadyBitch: heads up I have a new exam next Tuesday 2nd class. Half the class failed the quiz that would have let us skip the test so yeah..

Papa Hawkass: thankfully for you I wasn't planning an akuma for that time as I have a meeting. I'll be sure to let you study the night before, text me if you need help again.

Baby LadyBitch: will do!! Is the meeting with your son?

Papa Hawkass: nope

Baby LadyBitch: .. when was the last time you spent any time with him??

Papa Hawkass: ..

Baby LadyBitch: .....

Papa Hawkass: I'll schedule a dinner with him

Baby LadyBitch: :)

Papa Hawkass: *groans* why do I let you do this

Baby LadyBitch: because I provide Entertainment™️ ✨

Papa Hawkass: .. fair

~~

Baby LadyBitch: so hypothetically..

Papa Hawkass: yes??

Baby LadyBitch: hypothetically if I was best friends with Adrien(ne) Agreste the Genderfluid AroAce French Model, hypothetically speaking

Papa Hawkass: completely hypothetical, as you live in America

Baby LadyBitch: yes, completely hypothetical as I live in America and thus would never be able to become best friends with Adrien(ne). But hypothetically I am, and I got a message from them about a Aphobic co-worker, how would you hypothetically help them?

Papa Hawkass: well let's say in this hypothetical scenario that I am their father/boss Gabriel Agreste. I would say have Adrien(ne) report this hypothetical co-worker to me and I would fire them. Completely hypothetical of course, as I am Hawkmoth and so would never cross pass with the French Model hopefully soon to be Physics Teacher Adrien(ne) Agreste.

Baby LadyBitch: okay thanks!! I will go hypothetically tell my hypothetical best friend your hypothetical advice!!

Papa Hawkass: I will hypothetically keep you updated

~~

Baby LadyBitch: girl, guh, gay, he lp

Papa Hawkass: okay, stay calm, you got this. Have you had a conversation with her yet?

Baby LadyBitch: no....

Papa Hawkass: ok start there, have a full conversation where you trade names first

Baby LadyBitch: she in class, 3rd one of M&W

Papa Hawkass: ok that's a good start, you will see her often. Is there an open seat near her?

Baby LadyBitch: yes!! I zoom!!

Papa Hawkass: Woo her!! But Not too fast!!

Baby LadyBitch: I can do this!!

Papa Hawkass: you got this!! You can do it!!

Baby LadyBitch: I Can Do It!!

Papa Hawkass: Yeah!!

~~

Papa Hawkass: :)

Baby LadyBitch: mothFUCKER

Baby LadyBitch: *motherfucker

Baby LadyBitch: wait .. mothfucker works too, I take back my correction

Papa Hawkass: :(

Baby LadyBitch: :)

Papa Hawkass: just get over here so I can take your miraculous

Baby LadyBitch: omw

Papa Hawkass: don't forget the essay due tomorrow for Mr. Howard

Baby LadyBitch: completed it last night, can you edit it again?

Papa Hawkass: yeah send it over after the fight

Baby LadyBitch: thanks!!

Right after Ladybug landed to the newest Akuma of the week, before Chat showed up, the Akuma had the purple glowing mask appear.

"So talk, what's the girl's name. Make sure I can meet her at some point, I need to make sure she's good enough for you."

"So her name is Aubrey and she is adorable and so nice and sweet and you are absolutely never allowed to meet her. BUT I HAVE A DATE THIS WEEKEND!!"

"Nice! We'll have to talk later, your pet cat is on his way."

"Not my pet but yes will tell you later."

Chat Noir landed next to her, "hello my lady, what's the reason for the Akuma this week?"

"No idea, but we shall find out."

After the fight she used the horse miraculous and returned back to her dorm. Landing on her bed she stared at the ceiling. "What am I doing with my life?"

"You're best." Sam spoke up, walking into the room with a book.

"No, I'm really not."

"Villainous father figure problem??"

"YES!!" Sam just laughs, still thinking it was a joke. Marinette pouts.

~~

Marinette was sitting in her bed doodling ideas for her art class when her phone rang. Before looking at the contact she hit answer.

"It's Adrienne's birthday tomorrow, will you be here?" Hawkmoth's civilian forms voice rang out into the room. Sam looked up.

"Yeah sure what time?" Marinette shrugged at the questioning look.

"Could you swing by for dinner? She's excited to see you for the first time in half a year." 

"Uhhh is that your 'Villainous Father Figure'??" Sam asked.

"Oh, I didn't realize you had someone with you. Yes I suppose I am,I believe you would be Little Bug’s Roommate?"

"Little Bug?"

"Don't ask. And yes this is Sam, my roommate. I wasn't expecting it to be you calling so you are on speaker."

"Nice."

"Mhm, and yes I can swing by for dinner. Am I surprising Adrienne?"

"Please."

"Kay see you then." Marinette hung up and stared back at Sam.

"He didn't sound very Villainous." Marinette groans and flips off Sam who just laughs.

~~

GenderWho?IOnlyKnowCats: thankyouthankyiuthankyou

PinsAndNeedlesAreViableWeaponsHawkie: I take it you like your present?

GenderWho?IOnlyKnowCats: THABK YOU

PinsAndNeedlesAreViableWeaponsHawkie: YOUR WELCOME

GenderWho?IOnlyKnowCats: it's so swishy!!!!!

PinsAndNeedlesAreViableWeaponsHawkie: I tried to make it the swishiest just for you. Do you like the colors?

GenderWho?IOnlyKnowCats: it's Chat Noir and Ladybug themed. OF COURSE I LIKE THE COLORS YOUR USELESS BISEXUAL

PinsAndNeedlesAreViableWeaponsHawkie: WOW OK, ILL TAKE IT BACK IF YOU ARE GONNA OUT ME LIKE THAT

GenderWho?IOnlyKnowCats: says the one with a threat to Hawkmoth in their name. How did you even get here????? You are in America???????

PinsAndNeedlesAreViableWeaponsHawkie: listen I have strong opinions behind this name. And magic obviously

GenderWho?IOnlyKnowCats: Marinette, you were the holder of the mouse miraculous. Magic is a completely possible answer

PinsAndNeedlesAreViableWeaponsHawkie: ;)

GenderWho?IOnlyKnowCats: *sigh*

PinsAndNeedlesAreViableWeaponsHawkie: y'know you love me!!

GenderWho?IOnlyKnowCats: no I believe that was you

PinsAndNeedlesAreViableWeaponsHawkie: WOW OK

GenderWho?IOnlyKnowCats: LMFAO

~~

Even though Marinette Dupain-Cheng had no clue how her life had made it to this point, she didn’t think she would ever change it.


End file.
